Not My Groom
by N.V.9
Summary: Naruto is getting married and everyone but Sasuke knows who he plans to wed. COMPLETE


**Look toward profile/bio for disclaimer and anything else involving this story.**

"You were supposed to be here yesterday," Itachi remarked as he met his brother at the entrance of the beautiful hotel. Beside him, Deidara munched on popcorn, a little smirk in place as he watched Sasuke lift a brow in return.

"I had things to do. Unlike you, I do my job." Sasuke shot back a suit bag hanging over one shoulder.

"Me too, I just have more fun doing it." Itachi returned, moving to the side with Deidara as Sasuke stalked passed. "Sasuke-"

"Save it." came the clipped retort as the younger Uchiha disappeared around the corner.

Turning to Deidara, Itachi shrugged his shoulders and said, "I tried."

"Hmmmm, at least we got popcorn." the blonde grinned, holding out the bag to Itachi. "Ten minutes."

"Fifteen." Itachi said, popping a few pieces in his mouth as he placed his arm around Deidara's waist and went to find a place to watch the show.

"You're on."

{- - -

Sasuke wasn't sure why he decided to come. He had pretty much ignored everybody as he got his business off the ground, making it into what it was today. It took three years and he finally met his goal of owning a marketing enterprise. Now all he had to do was keep it from bombing and bank a few promising projects. He had a few things left to do and he hated leaving everything in the hands of Neji, who was more obsessed with banging his lover, Gaara, then running things. Hopefully, Neji would keep from losing the company Sasuke really wanted to market.

Maybe he shouldn't have come. Pretend that he didn't get his mom's message of 'Sasuke if you do not make it to this wedding, I will personally see to you myself'. Sure he was a day late, but it took that day to convince himself that Neji could handle things on his own. God, he was giving himself a headache. What could go wrong? Neji had it and all Sasuke had to do was make it to this wedding, happening tomorrow...come to think of it, who was getting married? He had seen the invitation but once he saw the name at the top, he had trashed it.

Sakura Haruno. World class stalker. Always knew what Sasuke was going to do before he did it. Knew exactly where he was going to be, what he was going to wear, and even what each expression on his face meant, though he was told countless times it didn't change at all. Sakura was nuts and to be anywhere near her was depressing. So she was getting married, why would he care? If she stopped stalking him on his website for his company and stopped sending him letters and panties, that he prayed to god were not used, he'd maybe possibly accept her breathing on the otherside of the world. He had no idea who the groom was, but he pitied the idiot.

"Sasuke!" he heard his name being called. Turning slightly he found Ino moving quickly toward him, his cousin, Sai, trying to keep up with the beautiful girl. Even in heels, Ino could run circles around everyone. It was her talent, as she liked to say. Apparently mall shopping was vicious.

"Ino," Sasuke answered as he waited for them to stop beside him, Sai trying to stay alive as he leaned on Ino's shoulder, trying to breathe. "if you plan to marry my cousin someday, I suggest you stop trying to kill the man."

"He needs to exercise. He's out of shape." Ino said evenly, making Sasuke snort. Sai was anything but out of shape. The man lived to keep his body in perfect condition...just not Ino Condition. If people wanted to stay perfectly fit, all they had to do was follow Ino all day. They'd lose the extra pounds instantly. "Anyway, I can't believe you're here. If I were you, I wouldn't have come."

"Sakura's your best friend."

"I know, but I said if I were you, not me. It would have been too awkward."

"Being around her is always awkward." Sasuke reminded her.

"I know that too, but-"

"Ino don't ruin the surprise." Deidara called as he walked by with Itachi. "Let us all have fun too."

"What are you talking about?" Sasuke demanded.

"Nothing. Oooooohhhhh! I know the perfect place! Come on!" Deidara shouted grabbing his sister's arm as he dragged her away. Behind them, Itachi and Sai smirked at him before following their loves.

"Hn." Sasuke dismissed them as an interruption of getting to the front desk. Which took longer then it should with a lot of people stopping him for unknown reasons only to back off when Deidara or Ino shouted for them to find a seat.

By the time he got to the front desk, which wasn't all that far from the door, Sasuke saw people everywhere. All that he knew, like his parents, other peoples parents, old friends... speaking of which, he wondered if Naruto would be here. He hadn't seen his blonde for three years and the thought of seeing him made him want to smile. He and Naruto had started off as rivals that later became lovers. Naruto was his personal pain in the ass that he loved with his whole heart. Being away for him for three years had broke his heart, but Sasuke did it because it was for both of them. Besides, at the time, Naruto was busy touring the world, sending odd postcards every month or so. Maybe if he ran into the blonde, they could-

"Hey bastard!" he heard someone shout, annoyed at someone else stopping him three feet from the front desk, he turned to find Naruto moving toward him. In seconds, Sasuke lost his annoyance and glared as the blonde gave him a big bear hug. Which hurt like hell coming from someone two inches shorter then himself.

"Get off idiot!" Sasuke growled pushing Naruto off. So he missed him seconds ago, this reminded him why he didn't actively search for Naruto in three years. Phone calls and post cards were enough.

"Gosh bastard, can't you pull the stick out of your ass and smile? Is it so hard to turn your lips like this?" Naruto asked as he forced Sasuke's lips up in a weird angle. "Second thought, don't smile, you look like shit."

"Hn."

"Hn." Naruto mocked before he grinned again, looking as if he wanted to jump in place. "I'm so glad you could come Sasuke. I didn't think you would and everybody said you wouldn't but I was hoping. It means a lot to me."

"I had no choice," Sasuke remarked dryly as he glanced toward his mom standing next to Naruto's mom.

"Still, I appreciate it."

"Whatever."

"Bastard, I'm being nice to you, you big headed prick!" Naruto shouted. "Three years and you're still an ass!"

"And you're still a moron. What else is new?"

"A lot." Deidara called out, sitting on Itachi's lap as his brother sat on one of the few chairs in the main room, popcorn going from his hands to Ino's and back again. Why were they all watching them? Didn't they have better things to do? Sure his and Naruto's meetings were legendary, fists and kicks usually leading to bruises and busted lips. They couldn't go five minutes without fighting, but if they didn't fight, everyone knew something was wrong.

"Anyway, like I was saying," Naruto began again frowing as he looked around to all of their guest watching them. "lets talk outside-"

"NO! Bar the doors!" a few people shouted.

"Or not." Naruto went on when people were quick to move.

"What did I get myself into?" Sasuke groaned in annoyance.

"Thanks for coming."

"You've said that." Sasuke stated, turning his full attention on the perfection that was Naruto. All the dirty things he wanted to do to that body... "Listen idiot, you and I need to catch up-"

"Hell yeah we do!" Naruto grinned.

"After this wedding, we can head to my place. I'll show you around-"

"I can't." Naruto cut him off.

"Why not?" Sasuke glared at Naruto denying him anything.

"Because I'm going to be gone for two weeks."

"Where the hell are you going!"

"Honeymoon, asshole." Naruto glared, inches from Sasuke's own glaring face.

"Why the hell would you go!"

"The groom always goes!" by this time both were so close together that there was very little space between them. People from the side saying that they were not kissing, just standing very, very close together.

"Which doesn't answer my question." Sasuke remarked, pulling back.

"God are you slow or just stupid!" Naruto huffed. "Listen, I'm not sure how the hell the weddings happen when you go, but here, the groom goes on vac-"

"I know how a honeymoon works. I just don't know what your involvement with this is." Sasuke glared.

Putting a hand to his forehead, Naruto mentally counted to three. "Sasuke, listen closely. Very closely." at the sound of his name, Sasuke paused and nodded to let Naruto know he could continue. "I'm going because I'm the groom."

After a long hesitation, all of which people were holding their breaths for, Sasuke smirked, "Right, tell me another idiot."

"I'm not joking, I'm getting married."

"Right, like you'd marry Sakura." Sasuke went on in the same manner.

"I am marrying Sakura." Naruto bit out. "Tomorrow."

"Of course you are and I eat candy everyday."

"Damn it you bastard. I'm being serious, I'm going to marry Sakura." Naruto growled.

"Naruto this little joke of your's isn't funny." Sasuke said getting fed up with this stupid thing. What was Naruto trying to pull? There was no way he was going to marry the pink haired banshee. Not when he was in love with Sasuke and Sasuke in love with him. Damn it! They were dating!

"I'm not laughing."

"You...you're serious?" Sasuke gaped at his friend's face, finding no hidden laughter anywhere.

"As serious as can be. Didn't you read the invitation?"

"I read Sakura's name but then threw it away." Sasuke got out, trying to think beyond the brain dead moment.

"Well-"

"What the hell are you thinking!" Sasuke shouted making everyone jump. Hells to the no that his blonde was going to be someone elses groom. No way in hell would Sasuke allow Naruto to marry someone else!

"Wh-"

"You cheated on me with Sakura!"

"Cheated? We broke up!" Naruto shouted back, getting angry.

"When did we break up? I do not recall ending our relationship!" Sasuke snarled, daring the blonde to come up with a day they called it quits. In all of their arguments, there was never a mention of good-bye! He'd have remembered that. The the thought of good-bye was slightly making him panic.

"I'm pretty sure the day you took off ended it!"

"No." Sasuke glared at his blonde! HIS blonde, that's right Naruto was his. No way he was letting his blonde be someone elses!

"What do you mean 'no'?"

"We are not broken up." Sasuke argued, daring Naruto to say otherwise.

"I'm pretty sure three years of not talking is a break up." Naruto grounded out.

"No." Sasuke said, thinking of phone calls and post cards. They counted as talking...didn't they? Sure half the time he let Naruto talk by himself on the phone as he did work, and he never responded to any postcards, but it still counted!

"No?"

"No, what part of it don't you understand?"

"All of it." Naruto glared at the smirking raven. "Listen asshole, I'm getting married-"

"To me one day, but since I have not prepared a speech, it is not tomorrow." Sasuke stated.

"-to Sakura."

"Who will not be invited to our wedding." was the slightly calm answer as Sasuke ran a soothing hand through his hair.

"Damn it you bastard!"

"Naruto, who gave you the bright idea of marrying Sakura?" Sasuke demanded glaring at everyone watching. "Was it Itachi?"

"Sasuke, I asked Sakura when she went with me on my last trip three months ago, we got to know eachother beyond what we already do. It was an eye opener for both of us." Naruto clarified. "She said yes and now we're getting married-"

"To different people, yes, but your wedding isn't coming up until I've prepared for it."

"Sasuke-"

"Fine, we'll get married tomorrow, but you will remember it as the worst wedding ever." Sasuke said. "We can take our honeymoon in four days. I have a deal to s-"

"I'm not marrying your pale ass! You damn bastard!" Naruto shouted as Sasuke ignored him.

"Mother, what are the flowers? Never mind, knowing Sakura they are all pink. Can you get them all replaced. Something that doesn't give you a headache or make you want to roll your eyes. In fact change everything. Something more modern. I'm sure Sakura already trashed the church with what she calls beauty." Sasuke went on.

"Yes dear," his mother nodded as she went off.

"Sasuke-" Naruto tried again.

"Oh and food, Father please change the menu. I want real food not rabbit food, but leave the tomatoes."

"Of course son." his father said and followed his mother.

"Sasuke-" once again he went ignored.

"Itachi, please order me a tux. I'm not wearing this suit...and order one for Naruto. I'm not marrying him in a suit he bought for another wedding."

"Of course little brother." Itachi smirked. "Deidara come along. You owe me winnings."

"I always lose." Deidara pouted as he followed Itachi.

"Never bet against a Uchiha."

"Unless I have a smarter Uchiha at my back." Deidara finished. "But it's not fair! You're the smartest one!"

"I know, which is why you will never win against me." Itachi chuckled, "And why we are married in the first place."

"Everyone please go back about your day. The wedding will take place tomorrow as scheduled." Sasuke finished, watching everyone walk off. Turning to Naruto, he kissed his lips and said, "You better be on time or else."

With that he walked off, not seeing the satisfied grin that crossed Naruto's face or people coming back into the room. Turning to everyone watching, he said, "I told you it would work."

"And you, Uzumaki, just bagged yourself a Uchiha." Itachi remarked.

"Not just any Uchiha, my Uchiha." Naruto chuckled as he walked off. After years of waiting for Sasuke to decide their next step, he made the bastard's choice for him. He wasn't going to be young forever and he rather be hot and in good shape for his wedding photos anyway. Oh he was good.


End file.
